all the world's a stage!!!

A Looooooooong Weekend!!!

5:45 PM, Sunday, August 20, 2006 | Link to this post |

At last! A long weekend! The only thing that I look forward to every first sem! Hehe! God was so good to me because I have no exams next week which means, I can enjoy the long weekend basking in relaxation. This is the Life!!! I went to the Acoustic Jammeng'g last Friday with the PSME-UPSU pips after ML since I'm craving for a 'night life!' Yeah! I realized that I deserve a break after a week of battling with stresses (as in NORMAL and SHEAR stresses... sorry for those who can't relate especially non-eng'g students. hehe!). I had a fun night! And for that, we came up with a new motto/tagline: PSME forever!!! We spent the night singing and playing billiards at Uncle Tats Kalayaan Ave. I went home at almost 4am then I woke up at 9am for a meeting with my beloved Stillwaters family. We celebrated Celso's birthday after the meeting. And since it's his birthday, we gave him a chance to ask the most dangerous question that he can ask to each of us. And my fingers were crossed as he started asking us one-by-one. Just to make the long story short, he revealed a lot of things about me. So I was like the 'star' of the day, with the most controversial issues. Parang naging showbiz talk show yung birthday ni Celso. Grabe talaga itong batang 'to! 'kala mo tahimik pero nasa loob ang kulo! Then it's a Sunday! I actually don't have a plan of what am I gonna do today. So I watched a movie instead. The title was Raise Your Voice starring Hillary Duff. I like the movie because it was all about music and I can easily relate to the characters. Aaaaaawwwwwwww.... And music somehow became my way of life ever since I entered that musical theatre job. I was so inspired by how Teri (Duff) dealt with the pressures of being a music student. She's struggling yet surviving! Tomorrow's the last day of the long weekend. So I'm planning to go to Tita Rachel's house for a movie marathon and to see their new dog, Rugrat.

- Gian

Last Song Syndrome

3:14 PM, | Link to this post |

As Long As You're Mine
from the hit Broadway Musical Wicked

Kiss me too fiercely
Hold me too tight
I need help believing
You're with me tonight
My wildest dreams
Could not foresee
Lying beside you
With you wanting me

And just for this moment
As long as you're mine
I've lost all resistance
And crossed some boarderline
And if it turns out
It's over too fast
I'll make every last moment to last
As long as you're mine

Maybe I'm brainless
Maybe I'm wise
But you've got me seeing
Though different eyes
Somehow I've fallen
Under your spell
And somehow I'm feeling
It's up that I fell

Every moment
As long as you're mine
I'll wake up my body
And make up for lost time

Say there's no future
For us as a pair

And though I may know
I don't care
Just for this moment
As long as you're mine
Come be how you want to
And see how bright we shine
Borrow the moonlight
Until it is though
And know I'll be here holding you
As long as you're mine

- Gian

Loving More, Loving Less

1:15 AM, Sunday, August 06, 2006 | Link to this post |

I'm struggling nowadays with a lot of things: studies, ministry, friends, belongingness... I've been experiencing too many ups and downs these past few days. Maybe, I am in the process of seeking the real purpose of my life. Is it for all the people I meet? Or just for a chosen few? But whatever way God puts it, I would gladly abide in His plans for my life. I'm missing a lot of things in my life not because I'm too busy but because, I keep on dwelling on trivial things.

I got the chance to talk to my 'friends' last Thursday after a stressful day. I have no plans of having a deep conversation with them, but one of my 'friends' is. She then shared 'again' her struggles in keeping up with us. Then I realized that we share the same struggles. What's worse than being told that they were irritated by those people who's so much dependent on them? It's a slap on my face when I heard that thing. Maybe because I feel so guilty about it. All of a sudden, you will realize that they aren't appreciating the things that you are doing for them. Many times I felt this way but this was the only time that my emotions were stirred so much, that I can't say anything more after they said that thing to me. I was so deeply affected that I backed-out of the emceeing job that was offered to me for the next day's ML. I've been a loser all my life I realized. I thought that people would appreciate what I'm doing. You see, I failed on one basic thing, I keep on craving for the approval of other people than God's. I think I am not assured of their love for me. God is telling me lately to love even if people don't love you. Give love even though you feel rejected or betrayed. But I have a hard time now thinking if those things were true in my life. I still can't believe that I heard that thing straight from them. Then, it came out that we were forcing our 'friendship' too much.

I don't know what am I gonna do. Letting go would be a difficult thing for me.
As for now, I need to re-assess myself and ask God what is it that He wants me to do.

I've heard it said, that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn. And we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them and we help them in return. Well I don't know if I believe that's true. But I know I'm who I am today becasue I knew you... Like a comet pulled from orbit as it passes the sun. Like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood. Who can say if I've been changed for the better but, because I knew you, I have been changed for good... Wicked the Musical

- Gian